“I don’t want to get to the end of my life and find I have lived just the length of it. I want to have lived the width as well.”
— Diane Ackerman
It was during my Kundalini teacher training (last year) when one of my mentors and teachers tore me to pieces. I was asked to teach my first Kundalini class (with no experience) during our very first week of training. However, my ego got in the way, and I suppose you could say I got a little cocky and told myself that it would be no drama (as I’d been teaching Hatha for the past three-plus years). Little did I know that it’s very different teaching a Kundalini class than a Hatha class.
So I got up there (I was extremely nervous), and I spoke a lot (there were a lot of words thrown in here and there as it’s a nervous habit of mine). I was pretty petrified, in all honesty. Where in a Hatha class you’re walking and moving around the room, in a Kundalini class you’re required to stay put on your rug. The class finished, and I wasn’t feeling pretty confident about it.
We were all instructed to come into a circle, and each person was given the opportunity to provide feedback about my class to the group. The feedback came from the students initially, and as I listened attentively I felt deep within that everybody was just being nice (as in they were afraid to speak their truth in fear of hurting me), as I truthfully knew that I hadn’t done a good job, but the feedback was saying otherwise.
Next came feedback from one of my main mentors and teachers. As I sat there I had a total out of body experience – she literally tore me apart. I sat there biting my lip (another nervous habit of mine) holding back the tears. The feedback went on for what seemed like forever, and I was wondering when was this ever going to stop.
However, I will also admit there was such a real honest and deep sense of relief – relief that I’d been finally caught, that someone could finally see through me and wake me up. I will be wholeheartedly forever grateful for my teacher for pulling me up, as painful as it was – this has been such a HUGE wakeup call on my path to truth and has very much been the beginning of my journey of connecting to my authentic self.
I had been lying to myself for a long time. I had been lying to everyone. The classes I had previously been teaching in Hatha (prior to my kundalini training) weren’t from the authentic Corona. They had been too prepared, pages of notes had been drafted up and brought to class and I would literally read from my notes to the students. How was this being authentic? How was this living and trusting in the moment? I wasn’t trusting in me, in me as a teacher and I sure as hell wasn’t connecting to my heart space allowing the wisdom to pour from there.
So I say with such a deep sigh of relief ‘Thank You’, ‘Thank You For Waking Me Up’.
When I returned from my first part of teacher training, I decided it was time to delve deeper into my inner world and look at what I’d been hiding and shying away from (my truth). So I worked with one of my mentors and one of the first questions she asked me was: “What are your values?” I have to admit that I was puzzled and confused. Being a coach, a teacher, and a deep thinker, I thought to myself “This should be an easy question for me to answer.” I didn’t know though. I was lost for words.
Somewhere deep within my heart and soul, though, I knew the answer was there, but I hadn’t really explored it so deeply before. It was time to finally explore my heart and soul’s desires, and to see what felt right and wrong to my heart and soul. I knew that my life would blossom because of it. It was time to finally create a life that I loved (but on my own terms). Each and every one of us has values. The question is, though, have you actually spent some time deciding on them? When I talk about values, I’m not talking about morals, standards, or ethics (these are decided by society).
Values are not what you think you should be to fit in; values are actually who you are. Recognising and understanding your values can be a very challenging exercise, yet it’s a deeply important one. Your values are at the core of who you are – and who you desire to become. When you can bring awareness and consciousness to these important elements in your life, you can then use them as a guide to choose the best option in any situation. You’ll find that making life decisions are defined from what you value most. When you are left with many options to decide upon, it can be super helpful and reassuring to commit and have confidence on your values – using them as a strong guiding force to point you on the right path.
Healing my voice, the teachings of Kundalini yoga and uncovering my truth has literally transformed my life. It has changed my life so much that I decided to create my 6 week online program Creating An Authentic You. I’m so passionate about this topic that I want to share all I know with others.
So many of us are putting up ‘with a half lived life’, we’ve afraid (petrified actually) to be ourselves. So we put a mask on, but the sad thing is we keep this mask on most of our lives. Let me tell you, I know all about this because this is exactly what I’d been doing for such a long time. If you’re reading this and you can relate to my story, please don’t judge yourself if you are feeling this right now. You are not weird, broken, abnormal or even unworthy lovely.
In fact, there’s nothing ‘wrong’ with you at all, it’s just that you’ve managed to do such an excellent job of paying attention to others and playing the game of modern life, that you forgot to tune in to the most important person in your world: YOU. The true you. The authentic, beautiful, wonderful you.
But there is a way out of the confusion and uncertainty. A way back home to your truth…
And I’d be honoured to guide you on the journey…
There’s someone who wants to meet you: your true self. This eCourse will teach you how to peel back the layers to make that meeting happen.
Over the 6 weeks of this online program, you’ll be turning inwards in order to extract your essence, amplify your truth, and live life as your full-blown self.
As you journey towards true authenticity, you’ll learn to let go of perfectionism, ditch the comparison, unshackle yourself from expectations (both from yourself and others) and develop a keen sense of intuition to guide you on your path.
Our intention at every turn will be to create the inner space for your truth to rise to the surface, then create the sense of trust and self-belief you need to listen to your own wisdom and heed its guidance.
Along the way, you’ll be gathering the tools, strategies, routines and rituals you need to stand strong in your personal power, take back control of your life, and keep your inner compass aiming true.
And best of all, you’re never alone – you’ll be joined by a deeply supportive group of likeminded women, all on the same soulful adventure.
Our end goal? A life that feels completely aligned and authentic, from the inside out.
That’s filled with ease, grace and fulfilment.
We begin our journey on June 29th and there are just a short few days left to register.
I would love to hear your thoughts on the above. Can you resonate? Do you feel as though your living a half-lived life at the moment?
With love and light,
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