This is a topic that comes up quite often with my clients and many of the women I get to speak to daily and so I thought I’d share a little on it today.
“We must look at ourselves over and over again in order to learn to love, to discover what has kept our hearts closed, and what it means to allow our hearts to open.”
~ Jack Cornfield
I myself use to really suffer spending time doing the things I knew would benefit me in my day-to-day life.
Yoga, Meditation, Journalling, Practicing Gratitude; these have all been invaluable tools on my spiritual path. However, often I would fight with myself to do these practices.
It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy the practices. It was actually the motivation I use to struggle with.
This is something I see time and time again with my clients. I see too in them (especially in the initial stages of coaching) an internal battle happen. At the end of the day, it all boils down to fear.
So here are some reasons I believe, why we resist doing the things that make us feel good:
1. Fear of change
We all on some level deep down fear change. When we engage in practices like meditation, yoga and journalling (to name just a few) especially for the first time, there’s a fear of the unknown. The desire might be in us to feel healthy, more at peace, confident, less busy etc, but change can be scary. So we fight it. As it requires us to delve into the unknown, where it feels unsafe.
But in order to create any form of change in our life, we must enter into the unknown. We must get comfortable with the uncomfortable. This is the only way we can transform. This is the only way we can break away from old conditioning and patterns that are no longer serving us.
2. Fear of the can of worms we may open
I see this often especially in Kundalini Yoga. This practice is so powerful, it will move what needs to be healed for us very quickly. For somebody that may have suppressed much of their feelings for much of their life, this is scary.
But the thing is, Kundalini Yoga will only ever bring up what we can handle! Often self-awareness can be like uncharted waters! You may think you’ve discovered it all, all those parts of yourself to find another part hiding under a rock. Often it feels safer to leave it untouched and to avoid and not go there! Let me tell you, this is not a good idea as eventually it will find it’s way to you.
Yes it can feel intense to enter into these murky dark waters, that we may have never explored before. In fact it can feel terrifying but you don’t need to do it alone. And if not now, when?
3. Fear in trusting the process
Again I see this not only in my clients but also with new students practicing Kundalini Yoga for the first time. There’s a sort of resistance in letting go and trusting in the process. This is normal.
Let me honestly share here that trusting any process — especially a slow process that might not contain any obvious light-bulb moments or immediate effects— requires time, faith and patience — this is difficult for many of us. We want immediate results. We want fixes and we want them now.
I’ve been on my own personal quest for over a decade now; and I’ve honestly witnessed steady slow drips. I don’t really think any major changes happened day-to-day. But when I look back over on these years, the shifts have been enormous.
When we can love and respect ourselves.
When we can be patient and compassionate for ourselves.
I believe we can handle absolutely anything – especially fear and resistance.
If you are honestly struggling right now, especially with doing the things you know in your heart are good for you. Please don’t struggle alone lovely.
Can you relate to the above? Do you struggle to do the things that are good for you? Share with me in the comments below!
With Love and Light, Corona xx
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